My Wise Boss

Had a meeting with my boss today for the first time in what seemed like months. I was losing my voice, and all day was blaming the ragweed, but it was actually stress and being upset and feeling some low-level rage toward everyone. I wanted to cry and ask for comfort and propping up, but instead I gave him an update on current projects (all positive) and then asked some "coaching" questions. I was asking about calendar management, inbox management, that kind of thing, and whether the executive brain needs to be able to break tasks into small micro-steps and then have fifteen different tasks going at once - you do a micro-step of one, then while waiting for a reply, to a micro-step of another, and keep switching back and forth.

He replied by saying a very wise thing (he could see through my questions to the real problem). He said, we all, human beings, have a tendency to, when we see something is not getting done, rush in a do it ourselves, because we want to pitch in, and get a result, and have success. (I don't think all human beings are actually like this, but most of the people they hire at my company seem to be, and then more people in Marketing are perhaps like this because we're not motivated by money, but by the fun of the job and by achieving excellence in your ad or print piece or web site or other creative production). But, he said, often that means we're spending lots of time doing things that aren't our job. We might be doing one of two things. We might be acting as a crutch, for someone who is actually not doing their own job. And we have to do it so the whole project gets done, but we're being a crutch for that other person. Or we might be over-managing our suppliers or other staff. We might be underestimating their ability to pick up the ball and run with it. And by doing both of those things we're enabling.

Those hit home. Definitely. I think I've inherited some systems set up because certain colleagues and suppliers had to be worked around and slack taken up for. And I know I push myself to do things myself so that they're done my way, and with excellence. But I'm killing myself, and also not acting like a manager, I'm acting like an admin or a typist. That's not what they're paying me for.

My wonderful boss offered to help coach me on these things, and I'm so glad! I was worried that all bosses at my company wanted to hear was "wins" and successes and achievements with numbers against them. But no, line managers are there for coaching performance! So I can go to him, imperfect and in distress, and he can help! And I did it all without crying! Even one tear!

So, if I can start working on these patterns, I think things will look up immensely.