Unencumbered

Tonight I was coming home from my second-ever guitar lesson (more talking than guitar, but we should have expected that, right - the philosopher signs up for guitar lessons) and I realized I didn't have any beer left so I stopped off at the grocery store. I had the Fender in the back seat fastened into the seat belt, which is how I usually transport it around town. If I could buy a guitar baby seat for it, I would. But this works for transport, and when I get to where I'm going, usually I put the guitar in the boot. However, I was just going to pop into the grocery store for long enough to buy beer, and didn't want to make a big deal of putting the guitar in the boot and then getting it back out again for the ride home, and Appleton is known for its low crime rate, and so despite the suspicious looking guy sitting waiting in his red SUV in the facing row of parking spaces, because Appleton despite its low crime rate has a high rate of suspicious looking guys, I decided to not only leave the guitar fully visible in the back seat but also left my red bag in the front passenger seat and took only my wallet in.

(At my old grocery story in Surry Hills I would not have done this - it was known for having junkies haunting the car park, at all times of day or night, and I'm sure none of them would have hesitated even one second to break my window to get the guitar, or my bag, either one of them or both, even in broad daylight, and I'm not sure any of the other junkies would have given a shit enough to have interfered and stopped them, even in broad daylight. We had to stop the tradition of leaving some change in the cup holder of the car for crossing the bridge and paying M2 tolls, upon moving to Surry Hills, because all the roving junkies would probably have smashed the window without hesitation to get a few cents, even though to repair a broken window cost about $269, and you didn't claim it on your insurance because it was less than your deductible and you wanted to keep your no-claim bonus, so for every opportunistic junkie it was $269 out of pocket to Windscreens O'Brien. This only happened once, there was a night that someone came and smashed the passenger side window of every car parked on our street, one after the other, but we learned that it was possible, and never left anything valuable in the car again, and never left any change visible in the drink holder up the front.)

When I got the beer, and also a cheap Aussie Red that I've now had two glasses of, I got a plastic bag rather than paper, and then put my wallet in it so I only carried out the beer and the bag with the wine and wallet inside.

And felt a tremendous liberation. Usually I have a purse, or a heavy bag for work, plus computer, and sometimes insulated lunch bag, and today also guitar. Walking around with nothing in my hands, nothing on my shoulder, nothing, just me, it was incredibly liberating.

I should go somewhere with no purse. I should pick an outfit with pockets and just walk out my door and feel the freedom of being an individual human being, unencumbered, walking through and around and here and there on the earth. Just me, my own body, carrying nothing, responsible for nothing, and moving freely.